You know, I just canโ€™t help but notice that every time Dum Dum talks about the Mueller investigation, he screeches about No Collusion. Always with the โ€œNo Collusion.โ€ Never do we get โ€œNo Obstructionโ€ or โ€œNo Money Laundering,โ€ only โ€œNo Collusion.โ€ Fine. Iโ€™ll give President Spanky a pass right now on all collusion charges. In exchange, Iโ€™ll gladly settle for three Obstructions of Justice, 14 Money Launderings, 11 Escorts, and various Orange Violations.

Dum Dum also just loves to vent about this โ€œwitch hunt,โ€ or, as he likes to tweet, โ€œWITCH HUNT!!!!!โ€ Questionโ€”are witch hunts bad? I mean, if you find the witches, thatโ€™s a good thing for all us villagers, right? And Mr. Mueller appears to be very good at this witch hunting. In 11 months, heโ€™s located 19, and got five of them to plead guilty to various witchcrafts. So this hunt appears to actually be going rather well.

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Twitler called the FBIโ€™s move on his lawyer Mike the Fixer โ€œan attack on our country.โ€ Heh. Thatโ€™s rich. A comedian, this guy. But you know, I bet heโ€™s positively pissed right now he won the election. Just steamed. I can see him in his DFT pajamas, getting into his own bed (Melaniaโ€™s choice) in the palatial White House master suite and saying, โ€œJesus, Mel, what the hell. Everything was going well. It used to be so very swell.โ€ And Melania replies, in her low Slovenian growl, โ€œYou had to be big shit.โ€ Don says, โ€œNo, honey, thatโ€™s shot. With an โ€˜O.โ€™ A big SHOT.โ€ And she gives him a glowering look that says, โ€œI had it right the first time.โ€

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Speaking of guys who are laying way, way, way down low, how about these Retrumplicans? I mean, have you heard even a peep out of any of the major vipers in the GOP, like Turtle Man or Eddie Munster? Dean โ€œWhat theโ€ Heller? You just hang out in your bomb shelters, shitheads. Hope you stocked up on plenty of chili. Weโ€™ll give you a buzz for the primaries.

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What? Larry had a massive stroke? Oh shit. Larry, of course, being The Grand Poobah of Burning Man, Larry Harvey, a man who has done some unbelievable engineering and nurturing to bring about a fabulous and fascinating visionary movement that continues to grow on a planetary level. And the fact that this movement massively recharges itself every Labor Day in the freaking Black Rock Desert? What a gas! Best wishes, Larry, and hope to see ya for some fiya on da playa this year.

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