Hustlers, starring Jennifer Lopez as a stripper who goes smooth criminal during the Great Recession, is getting some great reviews. Iโ€™m going against the grain on this one, for I find it derivative, boring and hampered by a shallow script. So, why? Why has the film been receiving Scorsese comparisonsโ€”hey, it has tracking shots!โ€”and high scores on Rotten Tomatoes? I think itโ€™s because of the powers of Jennifer Lopezโ€™s multimillion dollar ass. No question, as talented an actress as Lopez has been in the past (Selena, Out of Sight, shit, I liked her in Maid in Manhattan), her physical calling card has always been her ever-present, much ballyhooed butt. It beckons like an evil genie. Her ass has its own economy and solar system. In fact, as Jennifer Lopez did a pole dance in this filmโ€”for the obligatory โ€œThis is how you pole dance!โ€ sceneโ€”I could swear I saw a little astronaut just off to the left of her ass performing a space walk. This is a movie in which Lopez bares and displays her crazily potent ass. I think that this has caused some sort of distractionโ€”disruption if you willโ€”in the movie critic ecosystem. People are so hypnotized by her backside that they fail to recognize the movie kind of blows.

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